Last night I did not, as my WW leader says, Stop-Rest-Assess. I ate my dinner, walked briskly to the pantry, and helped myself to a large piece of left-over cake that my wife made for our family christmas gathering last weekend. Not only did I eat the cake, but I ate it in the pantry secretly where my wife couldn’t see me from her vantage point in the living room. I don’t necessarily even like cake. In my mind, the lie of getting my weight maintenance program going correctly after the next weigh-in (Wednesday’s) was running rampant. I should have “Stopped-Rested-and Assessed”.
I re-learned so many bad habits while I was training for the Rocky Raccoon 100 mile endurance run. I wish I never started running that much sometimes. I gave up the pursuit as to give my wife and my life more of me. The thing is, the 15 hours of running that I did every week unknowingly gave my “fat” mind the license to not Stop-Rest-and Assess before I ate. I knew that I could manage having extra points because I was getting like 100+ activity points a week.
I am having a tough time getting back to the good habits learned while I was losing the 130lbs. I don’t run as much now (which is probably a good and balanced decision) so I need to keep better track of what I am putting in the “cake hole”. One thing I know for sure though, and the blog is helping me with this, NO SECRET EATING ALLOWED. This is a very unhealthy habit.
I am going to pop back up and get going the healthy way. Thank God I have good support from my wife. I told her about the cake and we threw it and some other tempting food away right then and there. I get scared of gaining it back sometimes, but I can see very plainly that I am not where I used to be, but I still have so far to go.