Had a hard time, but I came out ok

For some reason by the time I was leaving work yesterday I was tired, grumpy, and lacking strength to eat healthy.  I just didn’t want to think about doing a good job with my eating and I felt like isolating myself.  I was kind of tired of people and I did not want to talk about anything.  To tell you the truth, I was going to go and eat a bunch of crappy food to try and make myself feel better.  You know, I thought of it like a reward for feeling tired.  To tell you even more truth, I was the one who put in SECRET # 26.  I am happy to say that I did not do it but I was just right on the edge,  just about to leave work to hurry off to the store and buy the junk food.  Then I got the call that put the pressure on even more.

My wife called just before I was going to go to the store.  She said that we were going to go out to eat with one of her friends and her husband.  I wasn’t that nice about it on the phone unfortunately but I agreed to go because I am really trying to be a more social person.  I was worried about going because of the way I was feeling.  The fact that I had to hurry made it impossible to go to the store for the junk food but at the same time I had another way to comfort myself (restaurant food).  On my way home I went back and forth saying, “Oh yeah, I am going to eat lots of the bread, a big steak, get a sugary coke, and some fries.  Oh yeah, I probably shouldn’t do that.  I will order grilled chicken and make sure I eat healthier.”  I talked to myself like this all the way home and also once I got home.  Finally I got in the shower and just prayed about it.

I decided that I would eat some veggies before I went so that I was not too physically hunger.  I also decided that I would do my darndest to eat what I felt good about eating.  So I ordered grilled salmon, steamed veggies, and a baked sweet potato.  I did not eat any bread and had some coffee to liven my up while the others chowed down on the bread.  Over all it went well.  I only went 4 points over my daily amount which was a real victory considering how I was feeling.  I took half the salmon home too.  This maintenance life is possible I guess, even on very short notice when I’m feeling like tired pooo.

16 Responses to “Had a hard time, but I came out ok”

  1. 1 Candice
    January 24, 2009 at 9:20 am

    When I first started checking out your blog, I was surprised that you struggle with food (as all of us do) given how lean and fit you are and the amount of exercise you do. Great job on being disciplined. The salmon and sweet potatoes sound great. And you even took half the salmon home! That’s truly amazing.

    • 2 run4change
      January 24, 2009 at 10:13 am

      THank you for your encouragement. Yes, I do struggle with food often times. I wish I didn’t, but that “fat guy mind” is still fighting for control here and there. 🙂

  2. 3 sarahlovesfood
    January 24, 2009 at 9:49 am

    I had a night like to too. I also came out OK, but I did go over my points by 12. I guess that’s why our weekly points are really for. I’m definitely a stress eater. Good for you for doing so well, even though you were feeling crappy!

    • 4 run4change
      January 24, 2009 at 10:14 am

      Awesome job. Those 35 extra weeklies are so important to have on hand. I have had my share of weeks where I devoured them early in the week. Those weeks are never as successful. Thanks for your comment

  3. 5 Kim
    January 24, 2009 at 10:51 am

    TIred Poo!! HAHAHA…I feel your pain and your struggle. I agree with the previous poster, it is hard to imagine YOU havgin struggles related to food…but as strange as this seems to say, it is actually encouraging that you do and that you are willing to share them so openly. Gives me strength to no end! Congrats on teh win yesterday!!!

  4. 7 Kim
    January 24, 2009 at 10:53 am

    Oh Jason you crack me up!!! Not only did you post the “Secret” but you then commented back to yourself! That is the ultimate in self talk!!!

    • 8 run4change
      January 24, 2009 at 11:12 am

      Ok now I am seriously embarrassed. I figured hey, i give encouragement to everyone else, why not give some to myself. I guess it was kind of dumb but I needed to hear both sides 🙂

  5. January 24, 2009 at 11:08 am

    Great job, Jason. I had a feeling you would pull through. Like a champion!

  6. January 24, 2009 at 12:01 pm

    SO NOT dumb Jason!!! I laugh because it just means that not only do you struggle with food as I do, but you are jsut as much of a dork as I am!!!!!! That is SOOOO something I would do!!!! YOu should hear my conversations sometimes!

  7. 13 afatgirl
    January 24, 2009 at 12:10 pm

    Reading your blog I am constantly reminded at how this is a lifelong struggle. That it doesn’t go away. The battle.

    And I like how you likened it to a battle 🙂

    • 14 run4change
      January 24, 2009 at 9:26 pm

      It is a battle. Maybe I should call it a war. In a war there are battles that are both one and lost. We win some and lose some during the was for our health. But we move on because it is possible

  8. 15 Rhonda
    January 25, 2009 at 1:10 pm

    Hi Jason. 🙂 I just wanted to say that I love your blog and it surprises me that you still have that “fat” mindset. I, also, have that “fat” girl mindset, but I have the fat girl body to go along with it. I never had a problem with weight growing up. After I got married, I put on a few lbs. and I went to WW with a friend and lost it. It was…dare I say….easy. Well, long story short…I’ve put on more than a few the last couple of years. I’ve had some major things happen to me in my life (loss of brother and housefire) that have completely put me in a tailspin. I’ve given up and I KNOW I need to take care of myself, but I just don’t care. …Your story has really inspired me to leave my pity party and get moving. Since you never give up, well…I won’t either. 🙂 Thanks for sharing your ups and downs with us.

    • 16 run4change
      January 25, 2009 at 2:26 pm

      It is easy at times when we follow the program right. Yes, don’t forget to take care of yourself. That is really important, especially when we are going through hard times. THanks for your comment and encouragement.

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