Do you do this!

A fellow blogger reminded me of something that I know all to well but had forgotten about.  Maybe you know about it too.  It is those situations where you make fun of your weight to get the first shot in because you think other people want to get a shot in about your weight.  Here is what the blogger said in the comment:

“Its a hard habit to break when there have been so many years of self-deprecating humor and mean comments directed towards myself (by me) in an attempt beat others to the punch and let them know that I’m fully aware of my fat (when in all likelihood, the majority of them weren’t even the least bit concerned with my fat).”

Have you been the victim of your own “fat jokes”.  I certainly have.  I can’t even count the number of times that I joked about my weight just because I felt uncomfortable with it.  I wanted to make people laugh about it and when they did I secretly felt hurt in a way on the inside.  I can’t recall the exact things that I used to, and sometimes still say.  It is odd to me that I still do this even though most of my fat is gone.  But the comment blew me away.  The light bulb went off and I thought, “Oh my God,I did that for so long too.  This is not a healthy thing to do, but I and so many others have or still do it.”

What do you think, can we stop making fun of ourselves and maybe just take things for what they are and move towards health?  What are some of the things you used to say to make yourself the “butt of the joke”?  Did you or do you do this kind of self-depreciating joking?  Let us know!

14 Responses to “Do you do this!”

  1. 1 darrellnurse
    February 14, 2009 at 6:04 am

    Happy Valentines day there Mister 🙂

  2. February 14, 2009 at 6:07 am

    You know the ironic thing is that remember how hearing an average weight person say how ‘fat’ they are, and the feelings that brings up when you were overweight? How irritating it was to hear that, and what those people must really be thinking? (Or at least that is what I thought when thin people commented on their weight).

    Now if you were to make those jokes, they would be interpreted totally differently now that you are at a healthy weight.

    I never really joked about my weight – I almost never mentioned it. Sort of like if I never talked about it, then I wasn’t really obese! Talk about head in the sand LOL!

    But, it seems as though obesity is still one of those areas where it is perfectly fine to joke, laugh, and make fun of people. Until more people come out and talk about the real feelings associated with being overweight without being judged as lazy slobs, it will probably continue to be that way.

    • 4 run4change
      February 14, 2009 at 6:35 am

      Great point. YOu are so right I think. We all need to get to talking about the reall side of it all. Thanks. Hopefully that this blog can be a place for people to talk about it in a real life way.

  3. February 14, 2009 at 8:38 am

    Been there! Still do actually. Funny really. Or maybe not.

  4. 7 maggieapril
    February 14, 2009 at 3:31 pm

    I was meeting two potential clients for the first time recently and they were talking about one of their employees and how fat she was. They weren’t making fun of her, but that was basically how they defined her. And I thought, “if they knew I had just lost 80 pounds we sure wouldn’t be having this discussion.” Needless to say it made me uncomfortable and I changed the subject right away.

    And yes, I used to make fun of myself. And I still think of myself as fat even though I’m really almost “normal” sized (whatever that is) these days.

    • 8 run4change
      February 14, 2009 at 3:34 pm

      That happens a lot. People will actually try and get me in on the fun making of big people. I have none of it.

  5. 9 Rhonda
    February 15, 2009 at 7:02 am

    Yes, I do it all the time. Why? I’m not really sure. I guess I just want people to know that Yes…I realize I am heavier than I want or need to be. I know my little one likes to play on Webkinz sometimes and there is a character on there named Plumpy the Hippo. I always say that’s me. I’m not even morbidly obese…but other people not only treat you differently, you wind up treating yourself differently.

  6. 11 Teresa
    February 15, 2009 at 2:12 pm

    I’m the queen of pointing out my fat to others before they have the chance to point it to me. Its funny now, that as often as I make fun of myself, I can’t think of a single joke to share. I think those jokes live in a secret place inside me that only opens when I’m a bit panicked and feel the imminent disapproval of others, and then they just jump right out of my mouth before I even have a chance to run them through a filter 🙂

    I have noticed lately how often a do a form of this — even if it isn’t joking about my weight, I’ve noticed that I feel the need to point it out is a variety of situations. We were doing something particularly hard and potentially embarrassing at boot camp the other day and I found myself making sure the others knew that I didn’t think I’d be able to do it as well or as fast as the others because of my size. Why? What was that all about? I’m definitely going to work to be more conscious of the times that I’m doing this and make every effort to not make my weight an issue. If someone else wants to make my weight an issue, they are the ones to be embarrasses by it, not me. In all likelihood, I think I will find that others will make an issue of my weight only a fraction of the times that I was.

  7. 13 Matt
    February 15, 2009 at 6:19 pm

    Hey, great post here. When I read that comment, it really opened my eyes! I was very big throughout elementary, middle and high school. Of course, in elementary and middle school I got it the worse! I was called bouncy ball, kids would pass by and blow there cheeks up to make impressions of me and, worst of all, I would walk down the street and a car would race by and some teenagers would yell “Fat ass!” Actually, worst of all was when you knew it was coming. I actually saw a car start to speed down from the other end of the street and I tried to hide behind a tree, except my belly was so big that hiding was hopeless. How did I know they would yell something? I just knew. I knew I was such a prime target for crude humor. With all that said, I was naturally gifted at humor. My humor got me around when I was younger. I made people laugh and, for that, they included me. They saw past my looks. But, many times, my humor revolved around my weight. I waged a preemptive war on fat jokes by making the best jokes first. There was no reason for someone to make a fat joke when I pointed it out first. But, your post was right, there were some people who would sincerely ask me, “why are you joking about yourself?” Those comments made me feel worse. I just said, “because it’s funny.” It’s not like I haven’t been aware of my past self degradation, but I suppose I never knew the real reason for why I did it. In fact, I always believed it was “because it’s funny.” No, it was to stop other people from taking the lime light on jokes directed at my weaknesses.

    Now that I’ve lost a ton of that weight (still have more to go though!) I take things a lot more personal now. In college, I don’t get fat jokes, but anything that may be hinting at my weight in the slitest really hurts me. I’m terribly sensitive to heavy/weight/fat/weak comments, UNLESS I’m the one that starts it. If I start to gain weight, the jokes become for frequent. When I start to lose weight and train, the jokes start to disappear. There are so many hidden benefits to getting healthy and losing weight.

    Thanks again!

    • 14 run4change
      February 15, 2009 at 6:27 pm

      That is a fantastic addition to this post Matt. What a great contribution. You really put it down just right. I and other will get a lot out of this. Thanks

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