Imagery for escapism.

image credit: homeyra.files.wordpress

image credit: homeyra.files.wordpress

In talking with a friend the other day about my own former and present desire to escape using food, drugs, etc., I shared an imaginative word picture to describe the reality of trying to escape. 

I may have shared this before but I can’t really remember.  I hate rejection.  I hate knowing or feeling like the people I love are mad at me.  It hurts me and I don’t deal with it good and when I feel like they are mad at me I sometimes eat to escape the feeling.  I used to drink to escape it, then I ate to escape it, maybe now I run to escape it.  Not sure but the point is that you really can’t escape the feelings and emotions and the situations of life.  We can try as hard as we want to but life goes on and so will the chaos around us.  We must walk on and fight our way through it.  I can’t escape, so maybe I should stop trying too.

Here is my word picture.  Sit back and relax.  Try and really picture this little imagery story in your mind as you read it.  Try to “see” it.  It impacted me greatly years ago and I find it to be true to this day.

As you get high or drunk or sugar drunk, you slowly yet peacefully start to rise up and float away from your chaotic surroundings.  All the craziness and hurt disappears as it gets smaller and smaller while you move towards the clouds.  You look down with a sigh of relief that all the crap is going bye bye.  It is becoming smaller to you even second.  Now you are in the clouds.  You have forgotten the chaos.  Enjoying yourself.  The peace, the quiet, the relief.  Of but wait a minute.  You start to float back downward.  You body leaves the clouds then your head.  You can begin to see the remnants of the chaos below as it grows in size.  Closer.  Cloooser.  Even closer now.  You abruptly touch down exactly in the same spot from which you left.  Nothing has changed.  Nothing is better.  You landed safe and sound but everything you were trying to accomplish by going up into the clouds is frivolous now.  You are in the same spot as you were before and the chaos is the same or it may have even grown in magnitude.  Then you try to go up again…….

Now think about if you spend years trying to escape only to find that you have lost that many years.  You keep trying to get away but life keeps on going by and when escaping doesn’t work you end up back where you started only further behind.  Food can’t do it.  Alcohol and drugs can’t do it.  Sex can’t do it.  Love can’t do it.  Nothing will work when you are trying to escape.  We can do this.  We can learn and grow and change so that we don’t have to try to escape and avoid anymore.  We can move on from the hurts.

12 Responses to “Imagery for escapism.”

  1. April 17, 2009 at 4:16 am

    Good Morning Jason… I loved your post! To me as far as running to escape whatever demon is haunting you, it all comes down to this “No matter where you go, there you are.”

  2. April 17, 2009 at 5:52 am

    Your message is timely. Found out yesterday that the guy I’ve been dating has been dishonest with me and a friend had a stroke (age 27). Later, we found out that our regular WW Leader has quit. It was a stinky day full of sadness for my friend and leader and rejection about the silly boy. I ate two cadbury eggs and a little bag of jelly beans…within an hour. Ick. The scene you described is so true and accurate.

    I was talking with a friend last night about the same thing. I can identify that I escape my troubles with food. The problem is finding the healthy route to deal with the troubles. My friend recommended counsel (other underlying issues). The problem with that is finding someone to trust. 😦

    *grumble* have a staff meeting to attend so I’ll be back later to finish this.

    • 4 run4change
      April 17, 2009 at 6:00 am

      THanks for sharing Amy. Have “fun” in your meeting. Look forward to hearing more. 🙂

  3. 5 Shannon
    April 17, 2009 at 7:45 am

    Your post is definately timely..yesterday a good friend lost her husband to cancer, and a close friend had a stroke. All I could think about was “what can I eat to make me feel better?” I chose not to eat, and go run instead. However, still couldn’t escape the problems. Life throws you curves, and yet somehow we make it through them. Hope you have a great weekend working in the yard! The sun will help our attitudes! 🙂

    • 6 run4change
      April 17, 2009 at 7:52 am

      Sorry about that Shannon. That is never easy but you are right that we keeping making it through. The sun will be nice. It a long needed burst of warm weather.

  4. April 17, 2009 at 11:54 am

    Wow! Amen! I’ll be thinking about this one for a while.

  5. 9 AmyJoGo
    April 17, 2009 at 6:52 pm

    Heh…meeting lasted WAY longer than I anticipated. I shouldn’t have clicked ‘submit’ earlier when I wrote that because it was such a broken and incomplete post.

    Anyway, what I was saying about yesterday is that I experienced one rejection or emotion after another and I ended up self medicating with sugar. As I was talking with my friend, he helped me to realize that I too was trying to escape my feelings by eating the sugar. He suffers from PTSD due to his war experience and said that when he first came back from war, he tried to escape the images and guilt by drinking and flirting/sleeping with women. Those were his drugs of choice for avoiding his problems. He eventually came to realize that he was destroying his family and sought counsel. He’s continued to see a psychologist for several years now and said that not every meeting is profound but the act of talking to someone…EXPOSING…the guilt somehow helps him to not feel so guilty. I can see his point. My problem is getting to a place where you feel able to expose those weaknesses.

    In your last paragraph, you said “Nothing will work when you are trying to escape. We can do this. We can learn and grow and change so that we don’t have to try to escape and avoid anymore. We can move on from the hurts.”

    So I guess my question is what exactly are you doing to learn, grow and change? For my friend, seeking professional advice is what helped him. For other people, counsel from a pastor has worked. For others, it’s been self help books. What do you feel has helped you to grow and change and move on?

    Hope this isn’t prying too much,

    • 10 run4change
      April 19, 2009 at 4:27 am

      Amy- Here are a couple of things I am doing or have done to get over/through stuff.

      1. God
      2. Talking about stuff honestly with trusted people
      3. WW meetings and actually listening and participating with conversation
      4. Counsel when I first became a christian regarding depression, drugs/alcohol, etc.

  6. 11 hope59
    April 17, 2009 at 10:08 pm

    Very, very cool! Thank you!!

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