Do you remember???????????????

This is my journal which contains every step of my journey over the last 6 months. It's got pictures, song lyrics, in-depth reviews of my own emotions, and lots and lots of processing. The small book on top is my newest WW book without any stickers.

Today I am choosing to REMEMBER!  On my way to work I stopped to get my morning coffee (which I am going to hopefully stop soon) and the powerful urge to get a donut or a pepperoni hit me.  I have developed some bad habits in hermitville.  But today I remembered why I started this health journey.  I remembered how it makes me feel to eat donuts on the way to work in my car all by myself so nobody sees.  I remembered how proud I was of myself when I was eating better, not perfect, but better.  So today’s motto is REMEMBER WHY!

Here is why I first started and continue on my journey.

  • I was starting to breathe hard just getting out of bed.
  • I had a very hard time to get my shoes on.
  • I felt like shit about myself because I was not living according to the way I really wanted to.
  • Being overweight was like being in an emotional tumble drying, my mind constant knocked me around about it.
  • I lived more secretively because I was afraid to be honest about my eating.
  • I was more afraid of rejection and that caused a lot of the secretiveness which in turned only caused weight gain.
  • I wanted to feel good about the way I was living.
  • I wanted to run a marathon someday.
  • I wanted to be fit and healthy so that normal activities would be WAY easier.

So those are the things I am rememering today.  What is it that brought you to the starting line of your own journey?  Are they all physical things like skinny jeans, small shirts, flat stomach, etc?  Or were some of them emotional and mental things that brought you to toe the line for the first time or possibly again?

There is no shame at trying again.  There is honor in it though.  EVERYBODY who succeeds has had to try again.  Mess ups happen, it might be a little easier to get back on track if you remember why you wanted to start this journey in the first place.

7 Responses to “Do you remember???????????????”

  1. March 19, 2010 at 7:14 am

    Just read your last few posts Jason! You are an amazing person… thank you for the honesty to share so openly. It is not easy! Back on track is the best way to be… I am there myself and things are moving forward for me as well! I support you through your journey Keep it up…

    I started back to tracking and logging myself on a program for my ipod touch. It’s been great to see in words where I am at, and seeing progress for it…

    There is nothing worse than the feeling of eating alone in the car we don’t have to live like that anymore!

    • 2 run4change
      March 19, 2010 at 1:24 pm

      I am so happy for you Carrie that you are moving forward with being on track. Great job and keep it up ok 🙂

  2. March 19, 2010 at 8:40 am

    I can relate with why you wanted to lose weight. It takes just one day to decide that you’ve had enough. It also takes a vision of what it is you want your life to be like after you lose weight.
    Then it is all about following a plan and know that the plan gets results.

    • 4 run4change
      March 19, 2010 at 1:26 pm

      Thanks a lot Frank. We all have our little realizations that forced us into considering a healthier life.

  3. 5 Lori
    March 19, 2010 at 7:07 pm

    It’s great to have you back, Jason. It’s always good to remember the shoe tying struggle as a baseline to never want to return to. I think of that & how I used to have to set aside extra time each day to stretch, wrestle and pry my clothes on and that’s usually enough to keep me in line.

    I set out to lose forty pounds and lost a hundred. Never thought I’d be running half’s and training for a whole marathon, something just took over and I am eternally grateful for having this second chance at life. I can’t believe how long I took my body for granted.

    Your post reminds me of one of the most inspiring songs of all time: “Ali in the Jungle” by The Hours. If you don’t already know of it, you must have a listen. And always keep getting back up.

  4. March 20, 2010 at 3:57 pm

    Oh, Jason, I’m SO glad you made this post. What a huge step forward for you. Reminding yourself of why you started this journey is the best thing you could do right now. I’ve been in that place so many times with my own blog. The more I stay away from blogging, the more out of control I am on my weight loss plan. It’s my anchor. I hope it will be your anchor.

    You’ve inspired me so many times in the past with my running efforts. You need to know that. People tell me on my blog how I have inspired them on their own journey and that always mean SO much to me. The fact remains that if it weren’t for your blog outlining the steps I needed to take towards running, I really don’t think I would have even started my first jog. I thank you so much for that.

    Now pick yourself up and dust yourself off and get back in there. =]

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