Posts Tagged ‘nutrition

16
Jul
10

Some thoughts and food update

I have given a lot thought to the marathon or longer races that I have been doing lately.  I enjoy the races very much and they give me a sense of satisfaction or accomplishment.  I feel good knowing I can run 26 miles with no problem, or finish a 50 mile race, or head down to Tennessee for my favorite Strolling Jim 40 Miler.  I have finished 26 races of marthon distance or longer but I have been asking myself why lately.  You see, I don’t want these races to be my “identity” or self-worth measuring stick.  I have been thinking that if these long races are creeping into the arena of meaning THAT, then I need to back off of them so that I can regain a healthier sense of who I am and what is most important to me.  I don’t want to get to a place where I think I am not in shape because I don’t want to or can’t run a 50 miler anytime I want to.  I don’t want to be thinking, “man, I only did 1 marathon this year I’m must not be a real runner.”  I am not there yet but I know myself and my tendency to do this so I have had to put myself into check regarding this.  So I have been considering drastically cutting back on these races so that I can begin to focus on more objective measures of success that define my fitness and my goals more accurately.  I am not looking to be one of the best marthoners or ultra-marathoners, I am looking to be in very very good condition as a runner who still enjoys running for the rest of my life.  Anyway, these are just the thoughts I have been having regarding this.

My eating went very well yesterday again.  I went to Taco Del Mar for dinner but had the calories and points to be able to do it within my plan.  It was very tasty too.  It’s friday and I don’t work tomorrow so I am finishing off my lunches today.  I feel pretty darn good physically and have lots of energy.  I will also run today, I think it is a marathon goal paced run for 5-6 miles.  I am just going to focus on enjoying that run for running’s sake.  Just be outside and enjoy the sensation of movement and experience the blessing of being able to run at all.  That’s all for today.

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13
Jul
10

My food until dinner time today

Here is my lunch for the day.  This is pretty much everything that I am going to eat from morning to evening.  I have already eaten my breakfast which was a protien shake with oatmeal in it.  It’s about 5 points on WW.  So I just threw this lunch together kind of because I woke up late and had no time to really make sure it was well balanced.  Here is what I got:

  • Two string cheeses-2 points
  • One nectarine- 1 point
  • One apple- 1 point
  • One yogurt- 2 points
  • One cup of spaghetti noodles- 4 points
  • 3 ounces of chicken in spaghetti sauce- 3 points
  • 3 ounces of potatoes with veggies- 1 point
  • Half a cup of lean ground beef- 4 points
  • Half a cup of rice-4 points
  • 100 calorie popcorn

That is 22 points total for my food I eat at work.  Counting my shake it would be 28 points.

I’m trying to get more organized with my food and exercise.  I hope to be able to be posting more now……………I have not been motivated to post much at all for a long time now.  It’s good for me to post as it helps me stay on track and give me motivation.

19
Mar
10

Do you remember???????????????

This is my journal which contains every step of my journey over the last 6 months. It's got pictures, song lyrics, in-depth reviews of my own emotions, and lots and lots of processing. The small book on top is my newest WW book without any stickers.

Today I am choosing to REMEMBER!  On my way to work I stopped to get my morning coffee (which I am going to hopefully stop soon) and the powerful urge to get a donut or a pepperoni hit me.  I have developed some bad habits in hermitville.  But today I remembered why I started this health journey.  I remembered how it makes me feel to eat donuts on the way to work in my car all by myself so nobody sees.  I remembered how proud I was of myself when I was eating better, not perfect, but better.  So today’s motto is REMEMBER WHY!

Here is why I first started and continue on my journey.

  • I was starting to breathe hard just getting out of bed.
  • I had a very hard time to get my shoes on.
  • I felt like shit about myself because I was not living according to the way I really wanted to.
  • Being overweight was like being in an emotional tumble drying, my mind constant knocked me around about it.
  • I lived more secretively because I was afraid to be honest about my eating.
  • I was more afraid of rejection and that caused a lot of the secretiveness which in turned only caused weight gain.
  • I wanted to feel good about the way I was living.
  • I wanted to run a marathon someday.
  • I wanted to be fit and healthy so that normal activities would be WAY easier.

So those are the things I am rememering today.  What is it that brought you to the starting line of your own journey?  Are they all physical things like skinny jeans, small shirts, flat stomach, etc?  Or were some of them emotional and mental things that brought you to toe the line for the first time or possibly again?

There is no shame at trying again.  There is honor in it though.  EVERYBODY who succeeds has had to try again.  Mess ups happen, it might be a little easier to get back on track if you remember why you wanted to start this journey in the first place.

29
Jan
10

getting close but feeling fat

Ok, I have been eating off of WW and kind of out of control for a while now.  My situation has proved to be more powerful than I thought as far as emotional eating goes.  I have really been doing bad in this area and I have realized that my feelings about myself really good down hill when I am not being good to myself by being healthy in general.  This sucks.  BUT…………..I am getting my goals reorganzied, writing them down, and starting to get more focus again.  It is sooooo hard.  It is one thing to be focused on healthy when you are doing well but when you are feeling bad about yourself it is not so easy you know.  But I shall start up again.  What else can I do.

The race is very close now.  I will leave in less than a week and toe the line in exactly 8 days.  I am nervous much because of my weight gain since my situation broke out and my life turned upside down.  However, I won’t give up.  Sure, my life is upside down and all around, but it is time to regain some momentum for health and being good to myself.  I will need to lose some significant weight.  And I will need to be patient with this.  I am hoping that participating in this 100 mile race will reignite my fire for life and health and weight management.

10
Jan
10

strong 6……8……..14………41.5

I had several days of heavy running.  I feel really good about it.  I discovered much about my body, my running, and my emotions.  I had a great experience doing all of these runs.  Extra special though was the LOOOOOOOONG one.  I of course LOVE those long runs.  I mean, sometimes I don’t look forward to them but they are so good for me I think.  I have to concentrate and push and step and walk and run and eat and drink and do it all again and again.  Pain comes heavy, easy , then nothing, then elated joy and amazement, then back do boredom, and on and on.  As many of you have read my knee has been bothering me.  I have never been injured.  I am still not injured thank GOD.  And for some odd reason I don’t push if I think I am about to be injured which has saved my running life many times.  This wisdom is contrary to my normal obsessive desires but I have such a desire to be a life long runner that I don’t want to jeapordize my future in running.  Not that I have a future competitively but I want to be able to run looooong in to the future you know what I mean.  It is an important activity for mind and soul and body for me.  Here is a picture of my knee and where it hurts.  Then I will tell you about my 20 miler turned 14 and then my 40 miler.

So there is my knee.  HA!  I thought I did not have really hairy legs.  Weird.  Anyway, on Saturday night after work I had scheduled a 20 mile long run.  I headed out and my knee hurt from the start.  It does not hurt real bad but I know that my knee is there if that makes any sense.  I had a couple of fast spurts across the street and a jump up to a curb that hurt VERY bad.  This caused alarm in my little heart and I called it short at 14 miles so that I did not do any damage that would hinder my ability to run 40 the next day.  Basically, I knew I could have finished the run if I shortened up my stride, went slower, and babied it but I did not want to chance it because the 40 is the staple of my running diet for the 100 mile race prep.  So on to today.  I got up at 7 a.m.   I had a fabulous mental and emotional break through.  It was exhilarating.  I was so happy to realize the things that I realized.  I felt totally liberated for the moment so I figured that would be a good time to go tackle the mental and physical trials of a 40 miler.  Once again, I headed out and my knee hurt right away.  It hurt a little more than the day before but I shortened up my stride and slowed it down a bit like I realized I could.  One step after the next, I made it to the marvelous moment at 1:54 into the run.  THAT IS RIGHT.   YOU HEARD ME RIGHT.  I RAN IN A BIT OF  PAIN FOR 1 HOUR AND 54 MINUTES BEFORE THE JOY CAME.  AT 1:54 ALL MY KNEE PAIN WENT AWAY.  NO MORE.  IT WAS GREAT. I proceeded to keep on keeping on until I reached home at the 41.5 mile mark.  I had to go that extra 1.5 just to put a middle finger up to my current life events.  I also went that extra 1.5 as a show of gratitude for those same life events.  I hate them but I appreciate them.  Does that make sense to you guys.

BIG MISTAKE OF THE DAY

I drink hammer nutrition perpetuem for my calories and hydration during my longer runs.  I usually use the orange flavor.  No problems at all.  This time I only had the delicious flavor of LATTE.  It tastes great but it has caffeine.  Lots of it.  So image drinking like a four shot every hour for 8 hours straight.  I almost had a fit out there.  At the 6.5 hour mark I could not take anymore in.  It was just to much caffeine for me and I have a HIGH tolerance as it is.  By the time I hit the 7 hour mark I was collapsing bad.  No water, no calories, and still running.  At the 38 mile mark I was dizzy, just about to throw up, and barely making it.  I did make it though.  I kept on.  Readjusted.  One foot in front of the other until I finished.  Then I had a king size fast break candy bar.  MMMMMM.

Total miles: 41.5

Total calories burned: 6,528

Total calories eaten: 2,080 (not enough)

Total hydration: 147 ounces

I was victorious again.  I only have 27 days until the starting line of my 100 miler.

09
Jan
10

Strong 6……8……..?………?

Since my last post I have had two good runs.  They were solid easy runs where I did not push the pace at all.  This week is very much about time on my feet.  This week as all about endurance really.  My entire weekend will be eaten up with running and work.  No time for fun this weekend.  Just run, eat, sleep………………..

So on Thursday I did 6 miles slow.  That run went pretty well and I felt good about completing a run.  Then on Friday I did an 8 miler.  This run also went very well but noticed some stiffness in my knee.  It was not really alarming but I will keep and eye on it.  It was kind of a bummer because it was like 38 degrees and pouring down rain for the whole run.  No optimal weather for running but certainly far easier for me than running in Hawaii.  So what is coming up today and tomorrow.  Today I am at work so will have to freaking do my long run aftwards which I have found to be very taxing to my ming and body.  I will be running 20 miles today after work.  Then, I will be getting home pretty late from that run to basically just go to sleep.  Early the next morning I will procedd to embark on another 40 mile long run.  This is really the main goal run for the week.  It is the most important single run to do but the entire 60 miles in the 30 hour period is the training effect I think I am going for.

I am going to change things up on this run.  I am going to try and eat more during the run.  I normally eat around 300 calories per hour while running and I am burning around 800 per hour.  This 40 miler I am going to try and eat some other types of food and more of my liquid drink.  I hope to crank it up so that I can see if I can handle eating more than 300 calories per hour.  This will help a lot during the 100 miler.

As far as my feelings are going, I think that my situation has changed.  I feel a bit more secure with my decisions to live healthy within my emotional and mental world.  I have decided not to let my situation hurt me anymore.  I have made my decision as to what I am going to do in it and it will most certainly be for the better without any doubt in my mind.  So I am happy for this new direction.  Very relieved.

On the weight watchers front, my sister has kindly invited me to get back on track and take me shopping for my weeks of groceries.  I have not felt up to this for at least a month and probably longer.  I haven’t even been to WW for at least one month.  Maybe like 5 weeks.  I just could not muster up the strength to go because this shit that is going on just takes to much out of me.  So on Sunday I will go shopping with my wonderful sister and she is going to make some chicken and tilapia while I am running that I will eat throughout the week.  I hope that this little kick start will help me get on track.

06
Jan
10

Two constant temptations coupled with two victories

I have fallen many times to the kind and gentle calling of the pepperoni. Even at 4:30 in the morning.

As you all know I love donuts and kept away from them for about 2 years. Now they have weasled their way back into my life. Here they are at my favorite morning coffe stop.

These pics show you my morning view of the two most tempting items in the entire Circle K store.  I have a deep deep love-hate relationship with these two things.  They are so tasty but really not that tasty.  They are filling but don’t satisfy.  Etc. Etc. Etc.  I think I just buy ’em, eat ’em, regret ’em in a mindless way.  Which is often the way I and others eat junk food.  We all know they don’t make us feel good emotionally or physically but we still think they will make us happy before we scarf them down.

Anyway, I figured I would take pics of them instead of eating them today so I got my “one step”, “one choice” victory today.  So far so good.  I will keep on keeping on with this.  Happy I did not do it.  Funny thing is, these are the two things I thought of first thing when I woke up today.  “MMMMMMMMMMMMM.  What can I get at circle K???”  It is sick I know but it is authentic.  You always get authentic with me.

Two temptations for the day conquered.

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