Posts Tagged ‘pizza temptation

13
Apr
09

If hunger is not the problem, food is not the answer!!!

pizza-001Kick me when I’m down gosh darnit.  I am trying to kind of start over today with eating right and counting.  I am on the verge of the negative guilt cycle but not there yet.  Then, two giant beautifully yummy pizzas are brought to me and my boss as a business gift.  I take one pizza in hand to deliver it myself to the ladies in the front office.  I really felt like I got kicked in the nads.  I am just going to list a couple of the ways I was feeling.

 

  • I felt like I couldn’t be a normal person and indulge.
  • I was mad that it is not healthy to just chow down.
  • I was sad that I chose to miss out on the pizza.
  • Why? Why? Why?

So I walked back to my office thinking of the title to this post.  If hunger is not the problem then food is not my answer.  I told myself that I am strong and healthy.  I told myself that I am not more of a complete person just because I eat pizza.  I am no less of a person if I chose not too eat it either.  I tried talking myself into believing that pizza doesn’t really matter to me and that food temptation usually only lasts around 5 minutes.  It was not the taste I was wanting, it was not the fullness that I wanted, it was the emotional feeling of being a normal person that I wanted.

Freakin A.  I am a normal person. HAHAHA  Only now I am a healthy normal person.  I don’t have to drown out feelings of insecurity or inferiority with food.  Screw that.  I will walk on and be strong.  I will not eat the pizza.  I will stay within my points which is designed to keep me satisfied for the day.  I know my points allowance for the day is enough.  One piece of pizza right now would put me at zero points for dinner.  I don’t want just veggies for dinner.  I want a real dinner and a real dinner I will have because I am going to make the healthy choice.  In fact, I already have.  I don’t have my camera to take a pic but I wish I did.  They cut the piece extra huge and the first thing I thought of was that I could count it as one piece even though it is big enough to be two.

See you later.